Surfpolitik Freemasons & Kneeboarders

In: Surfpolitik by Stu Nettle 24 Comments Thu 30th Sep '10

Tags: kneeboarding , david parkes , albert munoz , cheyne simpson , gav coleman , Steen Barnes

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Last year I wrote a short and mildly facetious article about becoming a waterman. The gist of the piece - which accompanied a spread of kneeboarding photos - was that I could adopt a waterman persona by adding a kneeboard to my quiver. This, as opposed to the tired old fish/alaia/SUP routine that is so often trotted out.

Within hours of posting it I received a call from Steen Barnes - a prince of a man if ever I've met one - asking if I was serious about giving kneeboarding a go. I told him that indeed I was, I've always been fascinated by kneelos and the places they can go in sucky waves. He instantly made me an offer: I could borrow one of his kneelos and quench my curiousity.

Now, my curiousity was sincere but I must admit to also harbouring an ulterior motive when I said yes to Steen's offer. You see, I smelt a story. I planned to surf that kneelo and pen some words on how riding alternative craft had changed my surfing outlook. I felt like a scientist predicting the outcome of an experiment before it happened.

Thing is, after giving kneeboarding a decent shot, my surfing outlook did change, though not in the way I was expecting.

The following week I drove to Wollongong and picked up the board from Steen - a fluoro green number shaped by David Parkes. For those who don't know him, Steen is a central figure in the Gong kneelo community. He's an organiser and documenter of the kneeboard scene. He makes his couch available to any kneelo passing through town, photographs all the kneeboard happenings, and has an incredible collection of old kneeboards (including a Greenough velo). He's a passionate fellow.

And he has a passionate troupe of performers surrounding him: Chayne Simpson, Albert Munoz, Gav Coleman. The more I found out about them the more it felt like there was a movement, a push, a cohesive unit of like-minded individuals that is rarely found in surfing - stand-up surfing - these days.

My first kneelo session was a solo go-out in six foot closeouts at Green Hills, Cronulla. The attraction was instantly obvious; late drops were handled with aplomb, and it was easy to squeeze in and around the pocket. The feeling was new and I had a blast.

The fact I surfed alone wasn't accidental however. Call me insecure but I was reluctant to paddle out my local on a kneelo. In my defence, part of it was that The Point doesn't break that often so to make the most of it I needed to be on familiar equipment. But then I also knew what the reaction would be and I balked. Kneeboarding is yet to be accepted by the arbiters of cool and, to my surprise, peer pressure was playing a part.

My doubts on how a late-blooming kneelo would be accepted were confirmed a week later. After finishing a session I bumped into a mate in the carpark and showed him what I'd been riding. "What are you riding one of those for?!" he spat. The prejudice apparent, but you don't really notice it till you're on the other end.

The reaction from other kneelos was altogether different. Once, while surfing at Woonona, another kneelo sought me out and we had a chat like we were the only two in the water. It felt conspiratorial and reminded me of when I owned a Kombi and other Kombi drivers would throw a peace sign when passing them on the road. Like a secret society.

Surfers often talk of being a tribe yet riding a kneelo was one of the few times I actually felt part of one. There was a sense of camaraderie that the oldboys claim existed in surfing but which is altogether missing now, lost in surfing's inexorable cultural expansion.

A few months back I began surfing Sydney's Northern Beaches more often and I thought I'd begin riding the kneelo more often too. After all, I don't know anyone in the water there so I don't care what people think. Yet, aside from a few sessions at Winki (a great kneelo wave by the way), I haven't been riding the kneeboard much. Steen's board is slowly moving to the back of the rack and I had to wonder why.

It dawned on me that, despite the function of kneeboards and the warmth of their brotherhood, I quite like riding shortboards. I realised I'm content attempting to perfect my shortboard while making the occasional foray onto a fish. I'm happy to have given kneeboarding a shot, yet the result was my surfing focus narrowed rather than broadened. Importantly, I didn't feel lesser for it.

The same way that Steen has found his niche in the surfing world I guess I've found mine, and if it means marching with the pack then so be it. Still, if I ever see a kneelo in the surf I'm going over for a chat. And if that kneelo is you then humour me please: when it comes to a surfing brotherhood, I want a bit of what you guys have got.

Postscript: Steen is currently compiling a coffee-table book on kneeboarding. It's guaranteed to be top-notch so keep an eye out for it. You can also check Steen's photographic work here.

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